When self-help author John Farley (Seann William Scott) returns home to visit his mother (Susan Sarandon), he's shocked to find out that she's fallen for his sadistic high school gym teacher, Mr. Woodcock (Billy Bob Thornton). Now, with their upcoming nuptials looming, it's all John can do to apply his self-help techniques to his own life and make sure his mom says "I don't."